MIAMI, Florida -
In life, we usually expect things to take on a certain path, giving us the confidence we need that everything will follow a devised chronological order. As teenagers, we imagine the "normal" process to consist of high school, followed by college graduation, a good and solid job in the "real world," marriage with the love of your life and eventually settling down and having a family. But sometimes, what you think will be the “ultimate finale” ends up being the first – when you’re least prepared and have no idea where your life is headed.
Growing up as a Catholic boy, raised by Cuban-American parents, Sergio had his life set out for him and knew which direction it would go. In high school, he was your typical adolescent guy: he studied hard and was focused on his education. But he was struck by cupid’s arrow when he met a girl by the name of Karen in his English class.
Smitten by this brown-eyed smiling girl, he started passing her notes in class, hoping he’d get her attention. Sending her beeps (remember those?) then calling her parents’ house (as Sergio puts it, those were “difficult times,”) , they got around to talking for long periods over the phone and got to know each other pretty well. Eventually, things started to progress on a comfortable, “I-really-like-you” level, and while both were sitting in his car eating pizza one day, he asked Karen out after the Homecoming Game.
Although the relationship had a rocky beginning (Sergio admits they broke up quite a bit the first few months), they in time made it out of their bickering phase and everything seemed to run smoothly. Months after they started dating, during Homecoming season the following year, Sergio got a call from his girlfriend saying she was late. After making a trip to Eckerds (now known as CVS), they found out she was pregnant and they were expecting a baby.
Hold. Pause. Rewind. Just like that, suddenly Sergio’s life completely changed. And he was faced with one of the biggest decisions he’d ever have to make. Did that mean soon gone would be the days of partying until the crack of dawn? A huge responsibility now rested on the shoulder of this 18-year-old man and there were answers he needed to figure out.
When I asked Sergio about whether him and Karen considered their options, he says they decided their only option was to keep the baby. “Honestly, abortion was never really an option for me,” he explains. “Not because I was raised Catholic, but because I just felt this was right. I loved her and I knew she loved me.”
Now, with the realization he would soon become a father, Sergio was left with the daunting task of telling both his parents and hers. To his surprise and astonishment, both parents respected their decision and gave them their full, undivided support. Two weeks later, Karen had a ring on her finger, and the following year, right before their son was born, they got married.
Sergio Jesus was born on June 6th, 2002, just a few days before Sergio’s (dad) high school graduation.
“I’ll never forget that [moment],” reflects Sergio. We had our moms in the delivery room and everything was perfect. I remember going out to tell my dad and as soon as I did, we just hugged and cried. I honestly couldn’t remember a happier moment.”
Sergio’s father provided him four words of wisdom that day: “It’s not about you.” He didn’t understand what his father meant at the time, but then everything started to make sense. Sergio understood that his life suddenly served a higher purpose and a greater responsibility than what he could have foreseen.
“As I’ve experienced being a dad and a husband, I figured his line was to describe how everything you do in life is a sacrifice when you’re a parent,” he says. “From waking up earlier to tend to them, having to work harder and longer hours, but, like everything, the best things in life are the things you achieve; not what you receive.”
That’s not to say there haven’t been difficult days, but Sergio acknowledges that it’s been worth it every step of the way.
Eight years later, Sergio and his now wife Karen have another son, Gabriel, and are happily creating their family home in Miami with their two young boys. They’ve settled into a life they could have never planned for but that ultimately became a true blessing in disguise.
“Looking back, I can’t even imagine life without my kids or my wife,” affirms Sergio. “I love my life and they are the motivation to keep on growing as a man.”
Back in 2002 and barely on the cusp of adulthood, Sergio was faced with making a decision that would potentially change the course of his life forever. But little did this-then 18-year-old know that it would be the right one and the most rewarding. One that has enriched his future, his family values and his overall journey. Life may not have taken the pattern Sergio predicted, but it's undoubtedly made him a better man. And that's been the biggest blessing of all.
:: Sergio and his two boys ::
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